Monday, January 05, 2009

Fair? Petty?

There are a lot of emotions surrounding the idea of marriage. Honestly, I've never planned to enter into any type of union, but that's not the point. Being a typical libra I'm uncomfortable with inequality.

I brought my boyfriend to my parents house once after I came out (2004) and was politely asked to no do it again...and I've respected their wishes. I actually don't ever expect any partner I have (no matter how long we've been together) to be accepted in my parent's home.

My sister eloped with a non-Mormon in Hawaii and although emotions were strained with my family for a time they all attended their commitment ceremony in Hawaii. Also, her husband would not be excluded from family events based on their relationship.

Is it just me, or does that sound like a double standard?

Me, playing the part of myself, I think about the future and potential scenarios...

I have 4 unmarried siblings, how should I respond (or not respond) to invitations to their legally, socially and religiously endorced unions?

Should I set asside my ideals and principles about the issue, or should I try to level out the playing field in my own little world?

Should I only attend weddings when both parties support gay marriage 100% and the officiating entity does as well?

Is this fair? or is it just petty?

1 comment:

jim said...

You: Should I only attend weddings when both parties support gay marriage 100% and the officiating entity does as well?

Let's turn this around. Let's say that you decide to change your mind and enter into some type of union (I'm still available!!!! hahahha). You ask your family to the ceremony. They will need to ask themselves, "Do I love Jacob more than this particular teaching of the church, or do I love that aspect of the church doctrine more than my loved one?" Once they confront this question, their answer is easy.

So, do you love your family member more than your dedication to this principal, or do you love the principal more than your family member.

With that said, my brother and my younger sister stand hard against many things about me (my orientation, that I am a liberal, that I was a science teacher). I doubt they would ever attend any ceremony for me. And my sense of what is right in the world would preclude me from attending any religious ceremonies they might have in the future. I love my personal standards more than I love my brother and younger sister, I guess.