Mormon Corporate Advertising

I was checking my email and deleting spam when I saw the following advertisement:

That's right, the Mormon Church is advertising on Yahoo!

The ad is animated, fading in and out with these questions "What happens to my loved ones when they die?", "Should I fear death?", "Where do I go when I die?" superimposed over pictures of people with diverse ethnic backgrounds.

I have a few questions of my own...

1. Why the focus on death? My opinion: It appeals to the mysterious and unknown to invoke fear. One of the best ways to manipulate someone long term is to make them fearful. The second step is to convince that person that the church's ideas about death are the only way of escaping/defeating it.
2. Why is the Mormon Church advertising through this medium? My opinion: Churches are corporations; they maximize profits by reaching potential customers anyway they can. Here is a list of other corporations advertising with Yahoo! at the same time: LowerMyBills.com, Wealth Daily (Investment Company), Express (Clothing Company), Classmates (Social Networking Company), Chase (National Bank), NFIB (Small Business Lobbying Firm). If you compared the sales model of each of these corporations with the Mormon Church’s proselytizing program you'd find more parallels than differences. Probably the most glaring difference is that churches aren't subject to taxation.
3. Why the display of diversity? My opinion: In the US, the Mormon Church is overwhelmingly comprised of middle and upper middle class Caucasians. They want to appear more accepting to minority groups. However, this is going to be a hard sell to any non-Mormon who knows anything about the church's history: (1) Mormon's didn't allow Black men to hold positions of authority until 1978; (2) Women are still not permitted to hold authority; (3) the Mormon church does not support equal rights for women and (4) most recently, Mormon's political campaigns to take away and prevent equal rights for gays and lesbians.

The Gay Tax

This is an interesting article about the economic burdens of inequality.

Proponents of Prop 8 on Google Maps

This is a geographical list of Prop 8 Support donors. Prop. 8 is an amendment to the California State Constitution which bans same-sex marriage.

Fair? Petty?

There are a lot of emotions surrounding the idea of marriage. Honestly, I've never planned to enter into any type of union, but that's not the point. Being a typical libra I'm uncomfortable with inequality.

I brought my boyfriend to my parents house once after I came out (2004) and was politely asked to no do it again...and I've respected their wishes. I actually don't ever expect any partner I have (no matter how long we've been together) to be accepted in my parent's home.

My sister eloped with a non-Mormon in Hawaii and although emotions were strained with my family for a time they all attended their commitment ceremony in Hawaii. Also, her husband would not be excluded from family events based on their relationship.

Is it just me, or does that sound like a double standard?

Me, playing the part of myself, I think about the future and potential scenarios...

I have 4 unmarried siblings, how should I respond (or not respond) to invitations to their legally, socially and religiously endorced unions?

Should I set asside my ideals and principles about the issue, or should I try to level out the playing field in my own little world?

Should I only attend weddings when both parties support gay marriage 100% and the officiating entity does as well?


Is this fair? or is it just petty?

Blacklist

The following people have been blacklisted for their bigotted stance on issues of equality:

1. Thomas S. Monson (Leader of the Mormon Church)
2. Rick Warren (Evangelical Minister)
3. George Niederauer (San Francisco Catholic Archbishop)
4. Celestino Migliore (Catholic Archbishop)
5. William Donahue (President of the Catholic League)
6. James Dobson (Founder of Focus on the Family)
7. Fred Phelps (Westboro Baptist Paster)
8. Pat Robertson (Televangelist)
9. Dallin H. Oaks (Mormon Leader)
10. Lance B. Wickman (Mormon Leader)
11. Rush Limbaugh (American Radio Host)
12. George W. Bush (Former President of the US)
13. Dick Cheney (Former Vice President of the US)
14. Rick Santorum (Former US Senator)
15. Patrick Walker (Pastor of the Macedonia Baptist Church in Southeast Washington)
16. Elaine Donnelly (Crusader against gays in the military)
17. Army Sgt. Maj. Brian Jones (Army leader against gays in the military)
18. Steven Anderson (Fundamental Baptist Church Pastor in Tempe, Arizona)
19. Richard J. Malone (Bishop of Portland, OR)
20. Scott Lively (President of Abiding Truth Ministries)
21. John Hagee (Senior pastor of Cornerstone Church in San Antonio, Texas)
22. Ted Haggard (American Evangelical Preacher)

Let me know about others that need to be added...I know there are lots more. I'd like to include those who are against civil rights in general...not just anti-gay persons/organizations.

In Reponse to Ignorance: Part VII

PUBLIC AFFAIRS: Is therapy of any kind a legitimate course of action if we’re talking about controlling behavior? If a young man says, “Look, I really want these feelings to go away… I would do anything for these feelings to go away,” is it legitimate to look at clinical therapy of some sort that would address those issues?
ELDER WICKMAN: Well, it may be appropriate for that person to seek therapy. Certainly the Church doesn’t counsel against that kind of therapy. But from the standpoint of a parent counseling a person, or a Church leader counseling a person, or a person looking at his or her same-gender attraction from the standpoint of ‘What can I do about it here that’s in keeping with gospel teachings?’ the clinical side of it is not what matters most. What matters most is recognition that ‘I have my own will. I have my own agency. I have the power within myself to control what I do.’ [Jacob: This is off topic. Yes, yes...we all ability to control what we do. What you describe is inequality. You can marry the opposite sex and don't have to repress your sexuality, but if someone else wishes to marry the same sex they have to repress theirs? Not everyone is Mormon. This is America, we're entitled to our beliefs and equal treatment under the law.]
Now, that’s not to say it’s not appropriate for somebody with that affliction to seek appropriate clinical help to examine whether in his or her case there’s something that can be done about it. This is an issue that those in psychiatry, in the psychology professions have debated. Case studies I believe have shown that in some cases there has been progress made in helping someone to change that orientation; in other cases not [Jacob: That's because some people think being bisexual is the same as being homosexual. This is untrue. People who are truly gay will not be able to be convinced that they're attracted to the opposite sex; people who only prefer the same sex might be deluded into thinking they can make a heterosexual relationship work, but this state is often not sustainable.]. From the Church’s standpoint, from our standpoint of concern for people, that’s not where we place our principal focus. It’s on these other matters.
ELDER OAKS: Amen to that. Let me just add one more thought. The Church rarely takes a position on which treatment techniques are appropriate, for medical doctors or for psychiatrists or psychologists and so on.
The second point is that there are abusive practices that have been used in connection with various mental attitudes or feelings. Over-medication in respect to depression is an example that comes to mind. The aversive therapies that have been used in connection with same-sex attraction have contained some serious abuses that have been recognized over time within the professions. While we have no position about what the medical doctors do (except in very, very rare cases — abortion would be such an example), we are conscious that there are abuses and we don’t accept responsibility for those abuses. Even though they are addressed at helping people we would like to see helped, we can’t endorse every kind of technique that’s been used [Jacob: This may be the official stance of the church, but there are local leaders who encourage therapy and even recommend specific psychologists and psychiatrists. Also, since Mormons preach so consistently that homosexuality is an abomination (a word often associated with hate), parents are motivated to subject their children to therapies that may not be safe.].

In Response to Ignorance: Part VI

PUBLIC AFFAIRS: You’re saying the Church doesn’t necessarily have a position on ‘nurture or nature’
ELDER OAKS: That’s where our doctrine comes into play. The Church does not have a position on the causes of any of these susceptibilities or inclinations, including those related to same-gender attraction. Those are scientific questions — whether nature or nurture — those are things the Church doesn’t have a position on [Jacob: I think the church needs to do a better job of communicating this to their members. Most Mormons I speak with believe the church has a stance on this, and that the stance is that people are not born gay (in other words, not nature)].
ELDER WICKMAN: Whether it is nature or nurture really begs the important question, and a preoccupation with nature or nurture can, it seems to me, lead someone astray from the principles that Elder Oaks has been describing here. Why somebody has a same-gender attraction… who can say? But what matters is the fact that we know we can control how we behave, and it is behavior which is important [Jacob: You're right, everyone is control of their own actions...that is not the issue here. The real question why the Mormon church is supporting inititives that prevent people from being treated equally under the law. Let's try to stay on topic.]

In Response To Ignorance: PART V

PUBLIC AFFAIRS: If we were to look back at someone who had a ‘short fuse,’ and we were to look at their parents who might have had a short fuse, some might identify a genetic influence in that.

ELDER OAKS: No, we do not accept the fact that conditions that prevent people from attaining their eternal destiny were born into them without any ability to control [Jacob: Ok, that's a belief. I was hoping you'd use some facts to justify taking away people's rights.]. That is contrary to the Plan of Salvation, and it is contrary to the justice and mercy of God [Jacob: Belief.]. It’s contrary to the whole teaching of the Gospel of Jesus Christ [Jacob: Belief.], which expresses the truth [Jacob: Not truth, a belief.] that by or through the power and mercy of Jesus Christ we will have the strength to do all things[Jacob: Belief.]. That includes resisting temptation [Jacob: Belief.]. That includes dealing with things that we’re born with, including disfigurements, or mental or physical incapacities [Jacob: Being gay is not a physical or mental impairment.]. None of these stand in the way of our attaining our eternal destiny. The same may be said of a susceptibility or inclination to one behavior or another which if yielded to would prevent us from achieving our eternal destiny [Jacob: I'll let god decide what my Eternal destiny is, not you or your church.].

A Mormon Who Doesn't Care

Here is a slightly humorous article by a Salt Lake Mormon who doesn't care if gay people get married; he has a very secular stance on what most Mormons consider to be a deeply religious issue.

It's so refreshing to hear from free thinkers in the Mormon community. Too often Mormon's let their church do the thinking for them.

Pro-Gay-Marriage Mormons

I never would have believed that there are a significant number of Mormons who oppose the church's promotion of Propositions 8 and 102 in California and Arizona respectively, until my email discussion with extended family.

Somehow, I found it easy to write off all Mormons as close-minded on the issue.

Apparently the church has become more and more divided on the subject, "Prop 8: California gay marriage fight divides LDS faithful."

Margaret Cho

I'm such a huge fan of Margaret Cho's. I have all her DVDs and admittedly have them memorizes as well, but for the first time ever I saw her live! So great!!! I was worried that with my high expectations she'd leave me disappointed, but she really delivered tonight!

"For the Bible Tells Me So"

I heard about this movie a while back, but thought it would never make its way to Phoenix. Fortunately the small theater on Mill Avenue near ASU showed it last weekend.

A group of friends and I saw it together and I must say I was impressed. This movie basically outlined how many people have used the Bible to stigmatize and justify their hatred toward particular groups of people; historically, African Americans, women and more recently, gay people. It was a very emotional at times, some people seeing the light from the beginning, others only a portion of the light, and some seeing it a little too late.

I knew I was in for a treat when there were protesters outside; oblivious to the fact they were proving the point of the movie.

Fight for Freedom

I remember being taught in grade school that when our country won the Revolutionary War we won our freedom, but the issue is far more complicated than that.

We are still waging the war of freedom. No matter who or where we are, we all play a role in this epic conflict. The victory that the original American colonies won against the British was important terrain on the path of freedom, but it only makes up a portion of the journey.

As a gay person, I feel my rights and freedoms frequently under attack. There's gay marriage, and then there isn't; civil unions one day, annulment the next. Our nation has been teetering back and forth on this issue for years now.

When this issue is stripped down to its core, what I usually find is widely accepted inequality based on holy sanction. In other words, god sanctions straight people's feelings therefore mine are invalid.

I know that many people's god doesn't validate my feelings, but my heart doesn't seem to care. My heart breaks just as much as anyone's. Love affects me in the same way as well, with all the irrational silliness that's been in poetry, books, stories, plays and movies since before recorded history.

Just like the oppressive monarchy we strove so diligently to separate ourselves from, we feel comfortable with imposing inequality on others because god said so.

Why was the king, king? Because god put him there.

Why did we leave the king's rule? Because religious freedom is important to us.

Why do straight people get more rights than gay people? Because god said so.

Why should gay and straight be equal? Because religious freedom is important to us!

Arizona votes down Marriage Amendment!

I'm so proud of my state! Arizona voters realized the ills of Proposition 107 which would have banned all unions similar to Marriage.

Marriage - A Step Backward?

I keep on hearing arguments from gay people who are against gay marriage.

At first I thought, "Are you crazy? You have to be kidding me!"

They say, "We don't need marriage...", "We want to be different...", "We don't need government sanction..."

My answers are,

"No one NEEDS marriage. Being different isn't all that great when you have no choice but to be different. Of course we don't need government to sanction our love, but we need them to grant us equality and rights."

The more I think about this intercultural conflict the more it reminds me of the feminist movement. No matter how unequal men and women are, there will always be those comfortable with that. They are happy, and I think that's beautiful; for them.

The problem comes into play when a person's choices are limited simply based on their sex, gender, and/or sexual orientation. Even if they wanted the same thing as a man or straight couple, they can't have it. It's all about the choices that are available.

We cannot have a completely free society unless the same opportunities are available to all!

Marriage Amendment

Two sides to the issue of adding an Amendment to the constitution

The pro-amendment portion gets 20 more seconds of air-time than the other, but I think its clear who I mostly agree with.

Straight? Unhappy? www.gay.com

Who doesn't love a good parody? This billboard was poking fun at Exodus' ad saying: "Gay? Unhappy? www.exodus.to"

I came across this amusing little tid-bit while browsing the ACLU's GLBT section. My amusement; however, was short-lived when I found out that Exodus was threatening this blogger with a law suit.

How is it that an organization that practices a denounced method of "treating" (more like abusing) homosexuals can be so sensitive about a simple parody. They think it's ok to associate being gay with unhappiness and expect no criticism? Truly, this organization is just as silly as the others who think gay is synonymous with depression. "Runny nose, huh? A band aid on your toe should do the trick."

Homosexuality causes depression; yet another widely accepted fallacy!

Partner Equality

One of the greatest things about a gay relationship is the potential for real equality.

In a straight relationship there are inherent inequalities; for example, pregnancy. The woman is always the one to carry the children and because of this the best that a heterosexual relationship can hope for is 'trade off.'

Trade off is very difficult when you try to equate two very different roles. The woman carries the child(ren) and the man works...is this equal? I personally believe that this setup is a lot more equal than the ones that are most common today: the woman works, takes care of the kids, cooks the meals, and balances the check book; the man works. Now, I realize that this isn't how all straight couples are, but there are enough of these incredibly unequal relationships to spark dialog.

Over the last 50 years, the woman's role has been expanding at a much faster rate than men's, but at the same time the number of same-sex couples has been increasing...

I have often been told by my straight friends that I'm either the woman or the man in the relationship, but it’s a lot more dynamic than that. My partner and I compliment each other in that we take on whatever role is necessary to get the job done.

Since we are not the "usual" couple, we don't have rules about who should do what. If one of us is sad, the other takes on the typical woman's role, comforting and sympathizing. If dinner needs cooking, laundry needs folding, money needs making, or house needs cleaning one of us does it or we help one another. There are no expectations and no gender stereotypes.

Yes, it is a great time to be gay. We get closer and closer to equality with our partner and equality with straight couples every day. I hope that in the future the straight and gay communities can put their differences aside and learn from one another.

There is something to learn from everyone, I hope I'm alive to see that day!